What can I say? I’m a people pleaser

We went to dinner with friends tonight, and we were chatting about this, that, and the other thing, since we haven’t gotten together in a few years. Somehow the topic of therapy came up, and Mike was telling the story of how my therapist told me to get a whiteboard for a list of everything I need in the morning, and I not only did that, but then took off and organized everything I could get my hands on.

I’m not sure if this is a me thing, a bipolar thing, or an ADHD thing, but I do this a lot. I get what seems like approval to do one thing and I do a whole bunch extra. In this case it was just my house – I can do almost anything I want in the house (within reason; Mike does live here and he does get a say). But I realized that I do this in other areas, too. For example, I was walking with my boss earlier today and she mentioned an alcohol order that needs to be put away and the lead was still off. So after lunch I went and put it away. She was a little surprised (and thankful) that I just took it on myself to just do it. I don’t want to say that I don’t do these things for approval, because I totally do. I want to make people happy. I want to do things for people. But this can definitely work against me.

It doesn’t seem to be mood/episode related, although yes, this is more likely when I’m feeling good.

Sometimes I don’t know how to rein it in. I go off like a shot and I’m gone. Mike’s gotten really good over the years knowing when to let me go and knowing when, and how, to bring me back in. There’s been a lot of changes to the house over the past month, but they’ve all been positive and all things that I wanted/needed to do. Or am I just justifying?

I think that this needs to be a thing that we discuss next therapy session.

I hope everyone has a great weekend. Stay safe!

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