mental health · wellness

I lost one of my favorite earrings

I’m totally bummed out by it, too. I thought it would turn up — that it came out in bed or getting dressed — but it’s time to face facts. It’s gone. So I ordered a new pair. Not the same one, the new one have screw backs so hopefully they won’t fall out with increasing frequency. The phones at work are notorious for getting snagged on my earrings and pulling them out. Hopefully this will help fix that. Or it’ll rip my earlobe. A chance I’m willing to take.

Enough about my earrings — I’m sure no one really cares about those. (Or maybe you do, who am I to judge why you’re here?)

I’m feeling very… meh… today. Maybe it’s because I’ve been up since 4:30 this morning (had to be at work at 6 and since I was headed to a different store I wasn’t sure how long it was going to take to get there). I’m still feeling very motivated. I’ve mentally planned out the rest of the night and tomorrow and what needs to be done and when. I also don’t really want to do anything except sit on the couch, do my nails, and watch reruns of Criminal Minds. Sometimes I wonder if my crazy productivity has an alternate side where I just don’t want to do anything. Maybe. But for tonight I’m going to do what I can to limit what I have to do tomorrow when I’m off so I can relax for a bit.

I have my first appointment with my new doc on Wednesday. I’m nervous — what if she wants to change my meds? What if she wants to try something different? I need to remember to hold my ground, be open to change, but only to a certain extent. I need to remember to advocate for myself. This isn’t going to be a fight, even though it feels like it. I’ve seen too many doctors that just want to medicate me into practically unconsciousness because of my diagnoses. I keep trying to tell myself that those were the “old days,” and in general doctors are much more educated as to how to properly medicate and treat people. Just because I have bipolar disorder, does not mean that I need to be turned into a vegetable.

I hate this part. I’m going to be a ball of anxiety until Wednesday morning.

3 thoughts on “I lost one of my favorite earrings

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